~Anything Right II~

So much to say, so little time for me to explain the way I feel and see things the way I want you to see them.
It makes sense to you all these things I do, I thought you had it all figured out while everyone else is confused.
Now how do you do that?
And in your mind I'm not blind, but then why are you right all of the time?
And if I think for myself would I be stepping out of line?
I'm not who you are, I'm so sorry.

I can't do anything right.
You don't truly know me but you're still in my life.
And it hurts so bad, do you want it to?
I shouldn't be like you. I want to be like you!

No matter what I do It's never good enough (for me).
I give all that is me, still It's never enough.
So why try? I give up.
What does it feel like, to fit in your shoes, and do it all so perfect like you do?
Tear me down again I kinda want you to.
And you're lovely, so beautiful.
And you're perfect in everyday.
My interiors rusted, I know your discusted. not sure who can be trusted... I'm busted.

I can't do anything right.
You don't really know me but you're still in my life.
And it hurts so bad, do you want it to?
I shouldn't want to be like you.
I want to be like you!

I can't do anything, anything right.
I can't do anything, anything right.
Can't do anything right.
Can;t do anything right.
I can't do anything right!

~Squeaks-Squeaker-Squeakems~
How can my words describe our friend Shawn?
Who makes us laugh although he's now gone.
Our memory of him will never end,
Though it may take time for our hearts to mend.
I'll never forget that face with his goofy smile.
I'll never forget when I heard of his last mile.
His life never really was perfect,
But on us it had the biggest affect.
We'll miss the smiles, the laughes, and daring each other to do things we know we wouldn't.
We'll rejoice the life lived, and not dwell on the things we know we shouldn't.

Squeaks was a son, a brother, and most of all a friend,
Because his friendship he would always lend.

Squeaks...
We'll sing the songs that make your memory go on.
It won't even seem like your gone.
God knows It's going to be hard.
I got to admit my heart is scarred.
But I know your in an awesome place.
Up in Heaven looking on our dads face.

I've cried my eyes out, and theres nothing else to do,
Except write this poem for you,
And let everyone know whats true...
Squeaks, We'll all soon be together.
You think we're apart? Never!
This could never seperate us... we're friends forever!

(Only one more thing to say)
Shawn... thank you for your friendship you would always lend.
I'll meet you at the East gate my friend!

(For our beloved friend... Shaun Givney (Squeaks))
11/18/03

~The Cody Show~

Welcome to the life that's full of twisted feelings, rumored lies, and friendly killings.
You'll analyze this poem like you did the rest.
Then you'll ask if I am feeling down, "Maybe depressed?"
But you'll miss the point that's in every writing.
You'll miss it because your to busy focused on the fighting.

You see...
You might believe that poetry is a "window to the sole" (as I have so often been told)
And if so... do you think mine is a gaping hole?
And you'll dance around the subject at hand, because you're not really sure where it will land.

What's so funny is that you don't even know.
By the way...
Welcome to the Cody show.

Welcome to my show.
I'm so glad you could come.
Sit down to watch, and have some fun.
Have a seat and relax a little.
I've made it easy, even though it might seem like a riddle.

But you're going to try to analyze it anyway.
So there's not much I can say.
Nothing at least that you shouldn't already know.
And by the way...
Welcome to the Cody show.

This is better then reality T.V.
Because you know how fake this can really be.

(This is the Cody show... It's not your show... this is my favorite show)

~Corrections~

Letters stuck to rubber, falling down upon the floor.
I turn my pencile up-side-down... and hope for God to give me more.

there...
all my mistakes are gone. all the poetry that was so sleazy...
so I turn my pencil right side up...
don't you wish life was as easy?

~Empty Hand~

I hadn't seen you in forever.
And I've forgotten your face.
Sun drenched happiness is my only memory;
as my heart takes the time to unlace.

I raise my hand at the auction.
And I count every lost penny.
Too bad the memories can't flood in.
Because, well... there's not very many.

And I can't help but feel my empty hand.
Can you guess what's running through it?
Same as with yours It's sand.
As my bitterest of tears seem to fall,
and hit hard when they land.

(for Andrew)

~Bless Me~

I've got you in a choke hold...
or is it you who has me?
My fury comes from the revenge of my thoughts,
the lies, and distrust.
Let me gain your notice!
I won't let go until you bless me.
Touch my hip, and shatter my bone...
but I still won't let go.
I won't let go until you bless me.

(Sometimes it feels like instead of fighting for a blessing, I am clinging during my wrestling just to keep standing. I guess I'm stubborn. Maybe more then I should be)

~Her~

I'm waiting on you.
Your person is only sparks in my mind.
But I'm waiting on you.
Your frailty hidden by secret's cruel bind.

Your love, wrote in dreams I've made.
Your face, of unfamiliar beauty laid.
Your words, with wisdom's timely delay.
Your hair, like springing life in may.

Your hands, of lovely petite crest.
My eyes on frail and beauty rest.
Your life, like spring time flower's bloom.
My heart of midnight dreams, made room.

To have you, hold you, take you soon.
Lack of your song is death's cruel tune.
To sleep and dream of loves fair thought.
To feel all the love you've brought...
Beneath the goodness two can bring.
By plans unveiled from our king.

To have you, hold you, as love stirs.
To know this dream, means hope endures.

To know that hope can endure.

(for "Her"... for you... I want you to know I do, and will always love you forever. how can I not love you? and I know if you are reading this, that you might think "how can you not love me because you only know the good things I've done"... baby I know you'll love me, and I've lived far from perfect. someday I know you will understand. I love you)

~Paper Soul~

I've seen your soul, your mind, and your heart.
Spilled out to make words, and a piece of art.
I've never seen you, I don't know where you live.
I just know these beautiful words that you give.
I love the wait, the pain, and the wonderful joy.
I love the situations, and dealings, in the words you deploy.

Your inspiration is key to your life.
Most of your words are gentle... others cut like a knife.
I feel I only indulge the reader a look of alphabetical rhyme
acting out my poems as if I were a mime.
But you set your life in a beautiful poetic embrace.
I'm just saying you've inspired me, even though I've never seen your face.

You've taught me that even love doesn't make your life wonderful,
it just makes your emotions more deep and more beautiful.

Thank you for your poems.

(to Megan Staley... I'm not a wack-o. I'm not in love with you, I don't want to stalk you... I just want to tell you that your poetry has inspired me. and I love how beautiful it is. thank you)