~What If~

Madness calling through the skirmish.
Love and hope, did never furnish.
Mud hits with your next cruel line.
Another hit without even a sign.
For all the days that have been lost,
All the good things still don't cut the cost.
Nights losing my mind in disheartening array.
Carpet so worn out, It's starting to fray.
Waking up screaming, with no comfort in my sleep.
All the secrets said, ones so hard to keep.
Lust made the paths you so heavily walked.
Doors to your heart, barred and locked.
"To the past without delay!" you say.
Never in the present, with will to stay.
Maybe hopes and dreams are true.
But the "what if?" will always stir and stew.
The point that was so close to your grasp.
But hands you turned away...
As you gasp.

(This one is older. The only reason why I am posting it is because I entered it at poetry.com and they told me that they will soon publish it in their annual poetry book. hurray for me! my first published work)

~Tiny Hands~

I've fallen so far,
And I'm broken,
Alone.
I want to be there for you.
I want to show you what love can do.
But how can I take the pain away...
When It's the only thing inside?
How can we sail away...
When we can't even hide?

Never gonna fly.
Oh I just wanna cry.
I just wanna cry.

I want to hold you as mine,
But I've been replaced.
I wish I could tell you all the things that I've faced.
When you look at me,
I wonder what you see.
I wonder what kind of person you'll grow up to be.
And will I grow up to see?
Will you grow up to see?

I want you,
I miss you,
I love you,
It's true.
Ask anything...
And I'll be there for you.
I'll always be there for you.

~Last Poem To A "Friend"~
#2

You may think I'm hurt.
As far as you can tell.
But I'm here to say It's over...
And I've learned to take it well.

But you can keep your opinions,
And the two cents you spent so freely.
Because I'd rather not talk to you,
Or ever let you see me.

I don't hate you,
I just don't want your ignorance in my life.
In fact I'm sorry for some of the things I've done,
And I hope you make some one a good wife.

Some times I wonder why I keep releasing you,
And you're boyfriend too.
Maybe because I feel It's the only thing to do.
It's the only thing left to do.

So here's my last poem...
My two cents and a dime.
I think you came into my life at the very worst time.
But I can promise that if you hear me at all...
You will never hear me whine.
I just wanted to write this and tell you...
I'm doing just fine.

Good bye.

~Last Poem To A "Friend"~
#1

Today is going to be a different day,
Because I'm without you now.
Looks without words,
You've nothing to say.
You act as if you wonder how.
I wonder now...

Spirits cling to your skin,
While you keep telling everyone the shape I'm in.
You might as well walk into the very den.
While you crush their hearts of tin.
Should I let you do this to me agian?

I don't hate you,
That's just the shape I'm in.
I don't want to see you,
Because I can't be put in that shape agian.
I'm so sick of being spread thin.
I'm spread so thin.

So if you ever see me,
Don't say "Hello", or "Good day".
I've had some questions,
You've had some questions.
But there's nothing we can say.
Because you've left me speachless with empty floors.
And I've left you speachless with slammed doors.

It's over because of the tounges we couldn't tame
It's over.
Try to forget me,
While I try to forget your name.